Life After Living

Tis the season for giving. According to my husband... though I could not find statistical data to back this, more people are willing to participate in organ donation this time of year. Here are some statistics from the United Network for Organ Sharing: Every 10 minutes someone is added to the national transplant waiting list, on average 22 people die each day while waiting for a transplant, and one organ donor can save up to eight lives! Organ donation is one of the most selfless and precious gifts one person can give to another. Having worked in ICU for two years I am not a stranger to organ donation. Though I have never taken care of a recipient, I have been present and participated during the crucial conversations of organ donation. It is a time sensitive subject, one that you wish didn't have to be presented to the family so close to them learning their loved one will not be returning to them in this life. However, it must be done before the window of opportunity closes. My husband has gone on numerous organ procurements over the years during his general surgery residency, his cardiothoracic surgery residency and now his pediatric congenital cardiac surgery fellowship.  Though it is always a tough situation you feel grateful to people who are willing to help another person, a person whom they know nothing about, whose life is hanging in the balance while they desperately wait for a match just for them. The decision to donate organs of a loved one is never easy. It is a very emotionally charged decision for family members to make. However if you consider the statistics presented earlier and the fact that your family member will no longer require these organs but that someone else somewhere can live to see another day, another week, another year or even more, it is the most gracious thing you could do. Whenever my husband has gotten the call that an organ has come available I pause to think about both families and the intensely emotional state they are now experiencing. Nothing though has hit me as hard as his first infant heart transplant this past summer. When he got the call there was an organ available I was so elated for this family to receive a heart for their infant child, then our daughter started to cry. As I looked at her sleeping, at her tender age of 7 months, my heart began to ache for the family who made the decision to donate their child's organs. Most of these children have experienced tragic accidents and for their families to have to deal with that situation and make the choice to donate is simply amazing. I cannot imagine what either of the families go through when donating/receiving organs for their children but I will tell you this, I hug my children a little tighter. There are so many sad stories that come out of children's hospital but there are also equally as many happy and triumphant stories. I wanted to bring to light the subject of organ donation and give you something to think about this holiday season. Ultimately living and dying resides solely in the will of God but certainly there exists within us an opportunity to help others at a time when all of humanity is struggling.

If you'd like more information on organ donation there are plenty of websites available and here are a few note worthy ones:

United Network for Organ Sharing: UNOS.org
Donate Life America: donatelife.net
Organ Procurement and Transplantation Network: optn.transplant.hrsa.gov

Unconventional Holidays

Holidays - dates on a calendar dictating when you celebrate, commemorate or honor something or someone. Before staying home with my kids I worked in healthcare in the hospital setting for 13 years. I am no stranger to unconventional holidays. There were many days spent with my “work family” sharing potlucks (when we had time to actually sit down and eat) and days later, after the date on the calendar, sitting down with my family sharing frivolities and a delicious meal. We continue to celebrate unconventional holidays since my husband has been on call and is scheduled to be on call most holidays this year and next until he graduates from his fellowship. Over the years we have figured out our own routine when it comes to these occasions. Often times, even when we do have a chance to sit down together the pager goes off or the cell phone rings. Those devices are as much a part of our family as anything else. We are a family who enjoy helping others and so we do not perceive it as a burden to work on traditional holidays but a mere opportunity to possibly help brighten or make someone else's holiday better. Who wouldn’t be grateful for a new, better functioning heart for Thanksgiving?  It is not always a person’s first choice or choice at all to work on a holiday but they dutifully report to work anyways. And so this holiday season give thanks not only for your family, health, happiness and those things you hold dear, but also give thanks to the many who will work on days when likely they would love to be home with their families just like you. Whether you are in a hospital being cared for by the staff, at a food establishment being waited on, pulled over because you were speeding to the holiday dinner you are already five minutes late to, please be polite, greet everyone with a smile or at least respect and wish them a safe and happy holiday.

Night #355

Last night was night number 355 with the little lady. She was born on November 26, 2014 at 846pm and we have not had one full nights rest since. That's right, she's about to turn one and she does not sleep through the night. In the beginning we struggled with colic. Her piercing cries in the night would almost bring me to tears. After a few weeks it was determined she was colicky due to a milk protein allergy. And so we started on the dairy free path. Nights got better with her but they were still long. No matter what we tried she would still wake every three hours and still does. We have literally tried every thing we could think of with her to get her to have restful nights. She does not have her days and nights mixed up either as she barely sleeps during the day. People have asked me does my husband not take a shift, or could I ask him to? And here is my answer....yes I could but no I don't. The reasoning is very simple, I would not want a surgeon operating on my child who has been up all night unnecessarily. Yes, there have been many, many nights when he has been up operating on someone all night but to ask him to be up all night with the little lady so I could sleep does not seem right. Especially when I think about if I were the family of a patient who needed an operation. And so it's just her and I every night, all night. However, last night, night number 355, she slept five and a half hours without a whimper!
It started out as every other night. A bottle at 7pm followed by me singing her to sleep. And at about 830 the sleepy cries started and I was sure we were headed for another long night. When she actually woke at 1050 for another bottle I was ready for bed myself. So after her bottle she went to sleep and so did I. When I woke, I couldn't figure out why. I looked at the time and it was 415. 415! I, like any mother whose child sleeps longer than normal for the first time, panicked! I quickly got up and checked to make sure she was still breathing, which she was, and then I was like Julie Andrews in The Sound Of Music!

I had just slept nearly six hours and even at the extremely early hour of 415 I felt exhilarated! My utter happiness must have been palpable as she woke up shortly after for another bottle but I couldn't have cared less. She quickly drank her bottle and went back to sleep at which time I laid there with the biggest smile on my face because it felt like a huge victory. Now tonight as we have neared bedtime again I can only hope and pray that tonight will be a similar night and that we can now bank on getting some sleep at night.

The Surgeon and The Blog

Meet the surgeon who is part of the inspiration for this blog. This is one of my favorite pictures of him. This is the real deal. This is him in his element. I had been contemplating starting a blog for quite a while now. I wanted to write about our life and how we try to maintain the balance between his crazy work schedule, home life and all of the shenanigans in between. There are many medical shows "portraying" the life of surgeons. However, that is all they are....shows. Our life is not something written by Hollywood. I will write of our triumphs and struggles. I will write about what home life is like when he is home and when he is not.  I will sometimes back blog stories from the past as a way to recount the memories and the road that has lead us to this point. This is my blog about being married to a surgeon.